Sometimes I am proud. Other times I am excited. This time I was brought to tears.
Autumn has never realized she is different. She has adapted to the world in the only way she has known how, and she has found a place for herself.
Her friends do not think she is any different. Aside from the initial questions about her legs, she is seen simply as "one of them."
We don't treat her any different. She has chores. We do not generally make things easier for her. She has now mastered using a stool to climb on to the potty.
Oh, and this girl despises help.
She can do it all on her own.
In her words, "I got it, Mom."
So last Sunday she decided she wanted to put on her uncle's shoes. I saw no problem with that.
I tried to upload the videos, but I'm having some difficulty. Sorry
Then she tried to stand.
Then she tried to move her feet and walk.
All of this was happening while she was saying "I walk. I walk."
Then she fell.
And she started to cry.
I had no words. My child has just discovered not only is she different, but her differences allow her to not be able to walk.
What do you say to that?
So I held her. I consoled her.
Then I went on the porch and cried myself.
I knew this day would come. I had imagined what I would say to her when this happened.
I didn't think this day would happen so soon.
As much as my heart broke for my super strong girl, I know this will only enhance her super powers.
Today she insisted on wearing her own shoes (that hold no real purpose other than cosmetic) all day.
She is such an inspiration with her determination. I have no doubt I will have to explain her disABILITIES to her again. But she proved to me that they in no way define her.
She is still trying to "walk." She is exceeding expectations that others (including myself) had put on her.
I hope this will weigh on the decision we are making in August with Scottish Rite. I hope they can see how her legs/feet are hindering her independence. In no way do I want to amputate my daughter's legs, but I do want to give her the best circumstances to succeed in life.
Years ago, when we were trying to have a baby, I don't remember asking for such amazing children. I can't believe that God allowed us to be a part of some of the most wonderful people on this earth. I am so very proud to be their mother!